Wednesday, April 20, 2022

Dubzaron Session 49: Magnet Golem Attacks!

This session was played on 03/16/22 using 1 game day for adventuring and 1 game day for rest.


This was a transitional session of sorts. We brought in a new player Acton (PC L1 Cleric of Turas) and the player of Rapunzel (Deceased Level 4 Priestess PC) was sitting out this week in shock and mourning from losing the Priestess last session. The player for Daria (PC Bladedancer level idk) was also sitting out from the disaster which was his Calling in that same session. He wanted me to assure all of you that he missed some #DND in mourning over his Caller failure but, in true BROSR fashion, did not miss any workouts. 

they fought this thing

He also reports his strength has increased 50% in most lifts. Amazing! One can only imagine his even more impressive strength gains and increased t levels if he played male DND PCs instead of broads.

The session ended up only having 4 players which is quite low for the #Dubzaron campaign. Real DND campaigns can handle this sort of thing, and alot of player turnover. Sometimes, like above, long term (legacy) players need a break. Or life comes at them fast and their elfgame is less important than irl. 

It's really no problem. As a DM you don't need to stress about it, just show up at the scheduled time each week and let them adventure how they like. It is on those players to analyze their current party capabilities and find a quest or mission for the session. Brosr dms don't "create hooks" or "craft stories" or guide a "spotlight".

Your group might see a situation where their front line fighter and cleric players are out for a week or two and only mages and thieves remain. It is on those PLAYERS to analyze their party skill set and perhaps, rather than delve a nearby dungeon full of undead and orcs, focus on a goal where stealth and magic would win the day. As a brosr DM then your job is to be flexible, to allow them room to breathe, and allow them room to create emergent story with you based on their character and his previous downtime activities. 

My party, despite being down many major players, however was able to head on back to the Nethercity without missing a beat. Because MadEye (PC Venturer level idk) has quite a few henchmen. His legs might be useless but he can hire men to schlep him around the caves beneath the city! They can also open the big stone crypt doors in the Nethercity and hold the front line for the less martial oriented PCs brought to the session. 

Session Report

The party delved the Nethercity and went straight for the section of the dungeon called the Great Temple of the Awakening. I've gotten a sense the party wanted to clear this section of the dungeon completely, almost like trying to 100% a video game or something. I'm not sure what their explicit goal was this night, probably a mummy crypt since those have been very profitable. But it was a random encounter with some weird jackalmen undead with a fire in their chest that was the story of the delve.

I don't remember all the details of the fight because it was a month ago but the 4 jackal things clawed down the front line of 4 henchmen fighter types and  Xanthos's (PC Cleric level idk) war dogs. In the meantime the fire in their chests flew around where they wished and burned up MadEye's loremaster mage he brought down to the Nethercity for study. (Back in the locker, nerd!) MadEye's thief henchmen was also all ripped up.

Nicholas the Wonderworker (PC Wonderworker L1) cast Summon Beserkers and I was back to making Mad Max Fury Road jokes about "witness me" and all that. These summoned beserkers have been through the ringer in this campaign and they keep coming back. So between the beskerkers being behind the enemy and Xanthos up front they were able to finish them off.

MadEye was calling tonight and ordered the party to double time it down the hall in the direction of, I assume, their session goal that night because he wanted to take advantage of the "free" front line fighter beserkers before the summon spell wore off. They ran ahead of the party into the darkness screaming for blood; shiny and chrome.

The party heard fighting up ahead and, when they arrived, some of the beserkers were fighting with and killed by an animated statue. It looked like a dark skinned human with a scarab for a head. Creepy! MadEye was intrigued by the depiction and checked with the Tower of Knowledge about it later (see Afterword). 

Anyway the thing was magnetic and some of the beserkers swords were sticking to it. At some point Acton tossed a beserker his warhammer and the two exchanged a bloodthirsty grin.

Eventually the golem was dispatched and the Party looted all the wall graves in the temple hall they had fought twice to travel down. They grabbed up the golem as well, dragging it out of the dungeon.

Some players needed to log off so it was a very short session and we ended there.


Recently the authorities of the city of Dubzaron finally noticed the grand treasure the adventuring Party had been bringing out of the Nethercity. They were informed that there is a 50% tax on all treasure found on empire land. That includes the Nethercity which is below the Capital of the Borderlands. 

Players were big mad. BIG big mad.

MadEye took the body of the golem to the Tower of Knowledge and they offered cash for it for magic item creation materia. They agreed they let the Venturer in on what their studies told them about what it was supposed to depict. 

On the way out of the Tower, Taxman Tomicus (NPC taxman PITA) caught MadEye and informed him that funds gained in such a way were to be taxed as well. The downtime chat channels lit up.

MadEye hired a tax lawyer to try and prove that golems are except from the taxes for Reasons. He sued Tomicus for stalking him to the Tower at all. I received requests for lawyers and PCs/Patrons studying the ability to "make an adventuring party legitimate" in the hopes it would lower their tax burden.

Players hate taxes but sadly this party is by and large extremely Lawful. They've enjoyed the fruits of being Lawful (what little those are, if you ask some of them on a bad day) but taxes? Nah, dnd players aren't about that. But Lawful PCs aren't about smuggling. So I had to field all the craziness above.

The result with MadEye is that the golem wasn't taxed because the Temple of Turas deemed Tomicus was in fact stalking so the evidence to tax MadEye was illegit. 

All the craziness isn't over. It's been a month and we're still hashing it all out. But I mention all this to show how a truly emergent world comes into being with this sort of BROSR play. 

The campaign itself has become so strong that I took a month long hiatus from DMing after this session and a substitute DM was able to run the campaign for me. 

1:1 time and Patrons pay dividends to a campaign world and I recommend you all give it a try. Check out my other session reports and entries for some advice on how to do it for yourself.

Happy Easter and God bless you.

Surviving PCs Present

Acton (PC Cleric Level 1): 238 xp gained. Total: 238

MadEye (Pc Venturer Level idk): 223 xp gained. Total: 5,118

Nicholas (PC Wonderworker Level 1): 223 xp gained. Total: 223

Xanthos (PC Cleric level idk): 238 xp gained. Total: 7,504


Dama (L1 Venturer) played by RR.  Current total xp: 75. DECEASED. Poison gas in Session 3.

Darius LeVay (L1 Assassin) played by JB. Current Total XP:451. DECEASED. Poison gas in Session 3.

Donald the Guardsman (L1 Fighter) played by MP. Current Total XP:570. DECEASED. Intra-party justice in Session 3.

Felix (L1 Thief) played by Nicholas. Current Total XP:431. DECEASED. Poison gas in Session 3.

Hektor (L1 Paladin) played by Moai. DECEASED. Cause of Death: goblin warg rider throat removal surgery in Session 2

Leonidas the Inquisitor (L1 Cleric) played by RR.Current Total XP:498  DECEASED. Frozen undead blistering cold aura left his skin frostbitten and broken in Session 6. Body not recovered.

Mard the Mage (L1 Mage) played by Nicholas. DECEASED. Frozen undead blistering cold aura left his skin frostbitten and broken in Session 6. Body not recovered.

Yolo Baggins "My friends call me Swaggins" (L1 Gnomish Trickster) played by J. DECEASED. Paralyzed and eaten by ghouls in Session 12. Body not recovered.

Jack Filcher (L1 Thief) played by C. DECEASED. Shot full of arrows by Inthorn's brigands in Session 12. Body not recovered.

Swoleous Maximus (L1 Paladin). DECEASED. Captured then drawn and quartered by Inthorn the Brigand warlord in Session 12. Posthumously named "Petty Hero of Turos Tem" by Legate Valerian. Ashes offered a place of pride in the Hospital.

Damianus (L1 Cleric). DECEASED. Captured and beheaded by Inthorn the Brigand warlord in Session 12. Posthumously named "Petty Hero of Turos Tem" by Legate Valerian. Ashes offered a place of pride in the Hospital.

Bucky (L1 Barbarian). DECEASED. Became a illegal pit fighter during his downtime. Had two bouts to the death, winning the first and losing the second. Was killed by Young Jack Sparrow who sashayed into the ring, drank rum, and mogged on Bucky before putting a dagger into his ribs, killing him. This happened during downtime between Session 17 and 18.

Broll Wolf-Eater (L1 Barbarian). Current total XP: 1079. DECEASED. Carried off by harpies after falling for their enchanting song in Session 19.

Brother Franklin (L1 Cleric). DECEASED. Decapitated by a mad cultist of a Lovecraftian slime thing in Session 19.

Felix the Elder (L1 Bard). Total XP 825. DECEASED. Captured by mad cultists and fed to a Lovecraftian slime monster in Session 19.

Templar Flavius Africanus (L1 Cleric). Total XP 7. Killed by the claws and beak of mad harpies in Session 19.

Xendi (L1 Explorer). Total XP 6. DECEASED. Carried off by harpies after falling for their enchanting song in Session 19.

Yllmeeton (L3 Shaman). Total XP 4,563. Bludgeoned by the corpse of a bowmen by Rosie Odonnel hag in Session 21.

Longinus (L2 Assassin). Total XP 2,036. Had his face ripped off by Rosie Odonnel hag in Session 21.

Mandonio (L3 Fighter). Total XP 4,779. Charred to a leprous crisp by diseased Dragon breath in Session 22.

Corydon (L1 Joker). Total XP: 0. Burnt to a crisp by chimera breath so thoroughly his corpse wasn't even fit for the crows. Died with a smile on his face and a song in his heart. that's life and as funny as it seems... some people get their kicks, stomping on a dream... In Session 25.

Donny Keebler (L1 Elven Spellsword). Total XP 2,238. Had his legs burned completely off by chimera fire breath in Session 25.

Marina (L2 Fighter). Total XP: 2,204. Burnt into ash by a chimera fire breath in Session 25.

Gundro (L2 Gnomish Trickster). Total XP: 2,575. Had his mouth and tongue bitten off by a lizardman ambusher in the dank sewers below Cyfaraun in Session 26.

Polydoros (L1 Fighter). Total XP: 0. Had his legs ripped off and eaten by Akira monsters in the dark canopy of the Viaspen Forest in Session 28.

Odrum (L1 Explorer). Total XP: 287. Javelin to the heart from the hands of weird vine goblins hidden in the walls of Ferigno's lair in Session 30.

Garvin the Nutless Wonder (L1 Mage). Total XP: 0. Fell off the side of Ferigno's lair 20 feet to his death in Session 30.

Blackmoon (L1 Assassin). Total XP: 768. Choked to death by BOB from Twin Peaks while stealing treasure from Ferigno's dragon horde in Session 30.

Xanthus (L2 Cleric). Total XP: 2,364. Choked to death by BOB from Twin Peaks while hanging out on the roof of Ferigno's lair in Session 30.

Lord Zyklon (L1 Elven Spellsword). Total XP: 0. LORD ZYKLON DISEMBOWLED LORD ZYKLON upon finding himself on the losing side of the Desolation of Turos Tem.

Turin (L1 Cleric). Total XP: 0. Eaten by Wargs in Session 32.

Rat Face (L2 Thief) Total XP: 1,577. Seemingly grabbed in the dark by a Xenomorph in Session 36. In a sinkhole your party can hear you scream! 

Smarticus (L1 Mage) Total XP: 0. Captured by a Xenomorph in Session 36 for all the party to witness. Taken deep into a sinkhole.

Hearticus (L1 Cleric) Total XP: 0. Gored to death by giant horned beetles in Session 39 after projectile vomiting all over himself from the stink of sewer sludge.

Mickey Mouser (L1 Thief) Total XP: 0. Gored to death by giant horned beetles in Session 39 in the happiest place on earth: the Cyfaraun sewer!

Aenes (Level 1 Paladin) Total XP: 62. Swarmed by giant flies in the sewer beneath Cyfaraun in Session 40.

Acianus (Level 1 Mage) Total XP: 0. Chopped to pieces in Session 42 by a six armed demon statue from behind and quickly forgotten about by his compatriots who saved MadEye and lamented Hardar instead. But I'll never forget you Acinanu nanu...nanite... nananaa...

Hardar (Level 2 Mage) Total XP: 2,832. Chopped up in Session 42 by a six armed demon statue as he held his Darth Vader Choking Grip spell long enough for his compatriots to escape an unwinnable battle. His dream to become the most evil being in the universe suffers eternally the indignity of being remembered for self sacrifice and laying his life down for his friends.

Nubbs (Level 3 Thief) Total XP: 4,017. Swarmed by scarabs which bored into his ears and brain in Session 45.

Grummz (Level 1 Dwarven Vaultgard) Total XP: 0. Ripped limb from limb by a throng of skeletons and their undead golem leaders in Session 46.

Grommzs (Level 1 Dwarven Vaultguard) Total XP: 2,168. Torn to bits and eaten by trolls in session 48

Rapunzel (Level 4 Priestess) Total XP: 11,540. Torn to bits and eaten by trolls in Session 48.

Alexa this is so sad play "Taxman" by the Beatles

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